Category: Stuff I Think About a.k.a. Squirrel

Definition

~ Denise ~ 6 Comments

Hey

Do I have your attention?

The first definition of hey is getting someone’s attention or expressing surprise,  anger or showing your annoyed.

Hey, John!  Come here a minute!

Hey!  Watch where you’re going!

The second definition of hey is hello.

Hey, Sue.  How are you?

The South is where I first learned how the second definition is truly used.

In the South, hey is  hello, hi, and how’s it going.  (Even though in my mind “How’s it going?” will always be associated with a certain  N’Awlins transplant.)

The first time I heard the expression was when we moved here for the second time in 1994.

I was walking down the hallway of the Realtor’s office with the boys in tow, and I heard a woman behind me saying “hey”.  She kept saying “Hey…Hey!”

I was like, “gees, I’m hurrying as fast as I can, pleeeese lady, give me a break”.  (This was in my head of course; you know, children with, trying to set an example and all that, however, we did have a big laugh and discussion about it later so….never mind).   The first chance I had to move out of her way I did and turned around, to which she looked at me and said “Hey, I’m so and so”.  It was then that I realized that “hey” was a greeting.

I guess it was only natural that I would start using the expression.

I don’t remember when I realized the frequency that I used it.

Maybe it was when we traveled to our home state of PA and I said “hey” as a greeting and got that strange look like “what the heck?”

“Hey” had become part of my everyday vocabulary.

Recently, Craig and I had a reason to travel to another part of the country.

I thought about it when I said hello to people who greeted me.

I said hello, or hi.  I tried not to just say hey.

I didn’t want to stand out too much, “don’t you know”.

Wardrobe Discussion

~ Denise ~ 5 Comments

I come from a line of tall women.

I like being tall; however, with some things it does have its drawbacks.

What I’m thinking about in particular this morning is wearing and buying slacks.

Now, my past generation of tall family women for the most part wore dresses.  They also made their own clothing.

I stopped wearing dresses and skirts for the most part when I stopped working full-time a few years ago, and I haven’t made me something to wear since the 80’s.  I don’t currently have any plans to start making myself clothing.  What I like and what I can produce are two entirely different things!

Buying women’s slacks, or as I say, pants can be a challenge.  Most local stores do not carry tall selections.  So you are left to either wear your own version of “petal pushers” or order online.  Ordering online can be time-consuming and costly.  First you don’t reap the benefits of trying on the item to make sure you like how it looks, so then if you order it and don’t like it you have the  hassle and cost of returning what you waited to so patiently for.  So when I find a store that has pants that I like, that fit, and I can order them online in tall, it is a win-win situation.  Trouble is usually then, the cost or how quickly they sell out.  Currently, then I am left with a few choices of pants to choose from when selecting my wardrobe in the morning.

Now, men seem to not have a problem with only a few items to choose  from in their closet.  They also have the ability to wear the same pair of pants over and over and don’t mind if anyone notices, nor do I think many people do.  I stand in front of my pant choices and have them rotated so I remember which day I wore which one.  I don’t think anyone else cares about this, and perhaps no one else even notices…you would have to be a detail person.

Have I mentioned before I’m a detail person?

So this morning deciding on which particular pair of pants that I was going to wear, I was also thinking that I have also shrunk over the years.

I used to be 5’-10”.  Now, if I believe correctly, the last time I was measured at the doctor’s office I was around 5’-9”.  What the heck?

I’ve always liked being tall.  As a matter of fact, there were years (and years) that I wore very high heels.  (Remember platforms?)  Yeah, I wore them.

Now I think I would topple over because of my ankles and wobbly knees.  I still have a few pairs of high heels (3”+), but for the most part a high heel today is anything over 1”.  Now the thrill of unsure knees and swollen feet, a lovely side effect of rheumatoid arthritis are not very conducive to high heels.  (Insert appropriate sarcasm.)

I digress.  Anyway, back to the shrinking.

I think that inch re-distributed itself.

Like around my waist.

I didn’t know my waist was so lonely.  It isn’t like my waist hadn’t picked up a few inches of friends over the years in my opinion and needed another inch.  Guess “waist” needed more company for tea and muffins.

I like muffins, and in particular the tops of the muffins, but do not like “muffin top” on me.  So, if I shrink anymore, I hope that any further re-distribution happens elsewhere.

I also hope I don’t keep shrinking until I get down into the petite section.  That would be a whole other issue entirely.  Ha!  Like that would happen!

Like I said, I like being tall.

Excuse me while I stretch out my cotton sweater a little on the sides.

There, that’s better.

Maybe no one will notice I’m wearing the same tall pants, again.  🙂

Detail Oriented

~ Denise ~ 4 Comments

My brain is wired to pick up on details.

I can’t help it.

Sometimes I like it, sometimes I don’t.

I can get fixated on details if I am not careful.

However, I am very select in the details I can get fixated on.

For instance, I can remember conversations that have impacted me strongly in great detail at times.  I may recall the person’s body language, facial expressions, and  location.  When people don’t recall it the same way, I don’t understand why.

I will notice errors in TV commercials, and someone else might not even know what the commercial was about.  (I have also been known to talk back to the TV).

I can mentally visualize a list of things, but forget something  from the bathroom to the kitchen.

You would think with all this attention to details I would be a whiz on our Tuesday trivia night.

Can you hear me laughing?

Bloggers…Getting Real

~ Denise ~ 9 Comments

I was following a blog that was both encouraging and informative.  The posts dealt with her Mother’s battle with  Alzheimers Disease.  Right now, I don’t know someone battling that, but I do have a dear friend who cares for her mother-in-law that battles dementia.   I thought the authors posts were well written and would find humor, encouragement and interest in what she would say.  I say her posts “dealt” with because she doesn’t blog anymore.  She had to stop because of “prying internet eyes”.  I don’t know what her past mistakes were that made her feel she must stop, I’m not judging her.  I know what she is today, by her words and the love she shows to her family.  Besides, I have my own past and mistakes.  Don’t we all?  “We have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God”.   I miss Sally’s posts.   And I often wonder how her Mother is doing.

My blog posts before they make it to WordPress, generally start out written by hand,  in a spiral journal, scribbled hastily, crossed out if using pen, erased if in pencil, sometimes with extra notes, written exactly the way they are in my head, even if it doesn’t make sense….even to me.  The erasers and cross-outs happen when I read what I wrote.  Sometimes that’s a big mistake, my mind goes off in a whole other direction!

Some don’t make it here.  Well, truth be told….

A lot, don’t make it here.

I am still keenly aware of unknown “eyes” reading what I write.  Well, while I realize there isn’t probably hardly anybody reading what I write, there is always the possibility of “someone” being able to read it.  Most of the time I don’t even know who that “someone” is.

Look, I know my English and Grammar isn’t the best.  I know there are great blogs with “Helpful Hints” and posts to help and all that.  Honestly, I read them.  I do.  However, I don’t want to be an English Major.  If I write, it is because I just want to write.  I do try to do a semi-decent job of “dot the i’s and all that”, but I’m not publishing a book here.  If I was, I’d want an editor for that!  It’s that old “people-pleasing” tendency that rears it’s ugly head, when I don’t post something because I fear what people might think.  Well, there, that’s full disclosure there for ya!

Those “internet eyes”.

There is this underlying tendency (that at least I have) that I want to be transparent, but  pride sometimes just gets in the way of completely baring it all.

So, if I can’t be completely transparent on here, then I don’t post something I have in my journal.    It’s not like I’ve written some great mystery or scandal or something, it is usually when I get in a funk and have that “write what I’m thinking about saying to someone” discussion who has hurt me even if I haven’t seen them in a long time.  I might have written words in anger or written words that do more harm than good, so what would be the point of that?  Especially when I know the person I’m writing about probably wouldn’t read it anyway.  That is when it is better to just lay those words at His feet.

I wonder if other bloggers feel the same way?  It’s hard to blog about your life.  It’s hard to be real about your life and talk about the lessons you’ve learned without talking about people in specifics.    A little while ago I posted about a blogger that is real specific about her family.  They aren’t speaking now.”Disowned” were her words.  I hope that they can reach some reconciliation.  I find there is such a fine line walking with our words honestly and still seeking to be loving in their delivery.  We are all a screwed up bunch of people hopefully trying to become what we are supposed to be.  Anybody that says they got it all together is either lying to you, themselves, or both.

It’s much easier to write about other things.  Things that aren’t personal.  Is that why there are many “how to”, “pet themed”, “travel”, or other “none personal”  blogs?   Life is the theme for me.  I read about all those other things, and I’ll even post about them sometimes, but I’m drawn to the personal.  I’m drawn to the community of those being real.

How do I pick the blogs I follow?  I have no rhyme or reason.  I might be drawn to it on WordPress by the title or a picture.  Someone might like a post of mine, I’ll check theirs out, someone I know blogs,  or I’ll find it on Pinterest.  Why I stay with blogs is for a reason.  I stay with blogs for content, information, enjoyment, and/or the encouragement.

Here are just some of the blogs I follow and why.  Stop by their pages, I’m sure my fellow bloggers will enjoy having you visit!

I really enjoy reading what is happening in Bulgaria with Patrecia a.k.a Miss Whiplash at I’ve Been Thinking About….  She seems to have mastered being able to  laugh at the “internet eyes” and posts what she is thinking about.  I feel like I am sitting in Bulgaria with her having a “cuppa” tea and a good old chat.  When she doesn’t post, I worry that she is alright.

For information on helpful hints, organization, cleaning and other assorted things, I read Jillee’s posts on  OneGoodThing.

A new urban farm and homesteading blog is Dirty Goat Farm.  Rebecca & Keith (names you may recall from Operation Soup & Smokes) blog about their farm, homemade laundry products, canning and other stuff.  Rebecca blogs the way she talks, I can vouch for that….I like that.

Mark at  Docmarks Place Blog and Jeanne over at Jeanne’s Blog…A Nola Girl At Heart are great places for words of encouragement.  More than once their words have matched my own devotional reading.  I love it when God does that!  Jeanne also has some great ideas for around the home and posts beautiful pictures and links to some great music.

Because of our interest in feeding the homeless, I follow Saints on the Street, a blog about a homeless ministry in Fort Wayne, Indiana.  The names and location may be different, but the need is the same.

I visit my friend Courtney to read about life with a larger family and some cute munchkins at Life on Courtney Lane.

I just recently started following two new bloggers so I can hopefully help encourage them to continue.  They are going to post about cupcakes/baking and reading.  You can check Carmen and Grace out at Reading and Sweeting.  I mean cupcakes and stuff…yum!  I get hungry for one when I look at them!  I’m looking forward to seeing what they write.

There are some other bloggers I follow that haven’t posted for a while, I’ll be happy to give them a shout-out when they post again or let you know when I find some other great ones!

Most if not all of the blogs I follow weave their lives into their posts.  They encourage me to continue to do the same.  So, I guess I’ll keep scribbling my posts, striving to be transparent.  You can’t get “right” about something until you are “real” about it “internet eyes” and all.

Here’s to the life story bloggers!  Happy blogging!

Dreamy Morning

~ Denise ~ 5 Comments

Had a dream this morning.  One that I remember.

I was dreaming about a wedding.  A wedding that I needed to hurry and get to.  One that I wasn’t dressed correctly for.   Outside it was beautiful and sunny, and people were hurrying to get inside.  Women were dressed in long, light, pastel, flowing dresses.

I was in shorts.  The kind of shorts you wear in your yard to garden in, and don’t care if they get messed up or who sees them.  Yeah, those shorts.

I was carrying two plastic bags, one of which I instinctively knew had in it a long, light flowing dress.  I thought I need to get this dress on, I’m supposed to be here, but I’m not dressed right.  I don’t recall what was in the other bag.

I remember getting a message, or the impression (you know how dreams work) that my best friend was waiting for me in the restroom, and that she didn’t want the wedding to start until I got there.  She could only wait another 65 or 67 seconds (it was one or the other that I heard, and I wondered why she was so specific).  So I knew I must hurry.

I was trying to get there, guests were hurrying past me, but I kept getting stopped, or distracted by people and would talk to them.  I remember having a discussion with a couple about a home they were looking at.  I stopped to notice the children playing in the aisle.  I mean, really, why couldn’t I get a move on it!

I started thinking again about my appearance.  I thought maybe I should just sneak around this corner, I could get to where she was and quickly change before the wedding and nobody would see me dressed this way.  However, doors opened, and it was the main aisle.  All of a sudden more doors opened and now the aisle was wide and there wasn’t any way to go around it you had to cross it.

Three or four middle aged women in “apron-clad” kitchen dresses, also carrying plastic bags, choose to cross the aisle, but not in a hurried way.  They didn’t seem concerned with their dresses nor their plastic bags.  They swayed and danced, swinging their bags.  I joined them at the outskirts of the circle, and found myself in a side room in front of a counter with stools.  The woman behind the counter asked me if I had my “strands” (here it sounded like ‘strands’, or I don’t recall the word she said).  I shook my head.  I didn’t know what she was talking about.  (I got the impression, it was something I needed, I had to have brought or bought.)  I started to feel sad and inadequate, and late.

One middle aged lady stepped up and counted what seemed like $10-15 and said “Denise, don’t you remember ‘mumble mumble‘ had me get this for you” (that’s what it sounded like anyway)  Another lady stepped up and purchased or handed over money for me.

I just remember feeling overcome with emotion from the love and and dropping my head.

Soothing words started coming into my thoughts.  With my head bowed, I could see an older male presence to my right.  I knew this was an older male by his hand.   While his left arm pulled my shoulder close, my head dropped and rested on his chest, while I glazed at the right hand which seemed familiar.  It was moving, getting ready to stroke my head.  I sensed I knew this hand.

My first thought was is this hand my earthly Dad’s?   Then, immediately, I thought, no, this is Abba, Pappa.  This is Abba, Pappa.  This is my real daddy.  This is God coming to comfort me.  Telling me, He is here, He is telling me He has always been here.  Everything is okay.

It was then I woke up.

Maybe you are inclined to think dreams are just jumbled up things, and don’t make sense.  Maybe you think you can make logical sense out of dreams.

I believe this dream was an affirmation of a decision that I had made three weeks ago and had been thinking and journaling about prior to a posting that I am working on and plan to post this later this weekend.

Part of this process is blogging about what I think, regardless of what I fear a reader will think.  Remember, I’m on this getting rid of clutter thing (A.k.a. C.C.).  That includes clutter of my mind.  Fear of what people think is something I’m working on.

You’ve been duly warned.  🙂

Clutter Control A.K.A “CC” (not to be confused with Canadian Club)

~ Denise ~ Leave a comment

Bottles of Canadian Club whisky for sale in Fu...

The first things to get rid of in “Clutter Control”, to be abbreviated as “CC” (not to be confused with Canadian Club, even though it is a fine choice if you like whiskey.  I myself prefer Jack Daniels; however that could be another post) has been the “de-clutter” and “re-organization” ideas, tips & magazines I’ve collected.

I already have this urge for order and “everything in it’s place” so when I read blogs, magazines, and see all the suggestions,  it can cause a sense of frustration at times to what I have already set in place.

So:

  1. I have thrown out Storage and Organization magazines with pictures that make me want to organize different rooms, closets and drawers with expensive and pretty accessories (that should save me some money).
  2. Weekly organization & de-clutter calenders along with corresponding daily to-do lists (that should save me guilt that I am not “using” them on the days when I see them and haven’t “checked off” the item they “suggested”).
  3. Miscellaneous torn pages out of magazines of articles on “organization tips” and “household tips” (see numbers 1, 2 and 3.)
  4. Any pins that I have pinned to my boards on Pinterest.  (see numbers 1, 2, 3 and freeing up computer time).
  5. Removed “bookmarks” to blogs about said interests, and removed myself from email lists.  (you can pretty much figure out how that will help!) 🙂

Will I stop reading & looking at the pictures in magazines?  No.  But, here is what I figure.  If I haven’t taken the time to do what the pictures have shown, or what Ive pinned to my Pinterest, or utilized the hints from the organization blogs, or calendars – they are just clutter for my mind, my home, my computer, additional paper piles or files, guilt, and sometimes just plain jealous thoughts of what I couldn’t or haven’t achieved of what I see.  Sometimes they have just been a way to get me to just want more.  Who needs that?

Like I said, I already have an urge to have things organized.   Reading or seeing things has me wanting “re-do” or “re-structure” existing systems to “make better” or “prettier” or “be-moan” what I don’t have “structured”.

At the core, don’t we really know what to do with any clutter we have – eliminate it.  Once that is done than we can decide how to organize what is left.  Sometimes looking at all the pretty options of containers and organizations enables us to keep more clutter & items that we have to store.

So…off to the recycling bin goes the paper!

I feel lighter already!